Contact
- first perceptual contact
- gain a physical picture of individual (sound, smell, gender, age, race, height, etc.)
- interaction is superficial and impersonal (small talk/nonverbal behavior)
- within first FOUR minutes it is decided if you want to pursue a relationship or not
- physical appearance is important in initial development of attraction
- individual qualities are revealed (friendliness, warmth, openness, and dynamism)
Involvement
- a sense of mutuality, of being connected, develops
- experiment and try to learn more about other person
- preliminary testing goes on, want to see if initial judgment proves reasonable
- continue involvement by intensifying interaction
- share feelings and emotions (self-disclosure)
- each person tries to find out how the other feels about the relationship
Intimacy
- feeling that you can be honest and open when talking about yourself,
- ability to express thoughts and feelings not revealed in other relationships
- commit further and establish a kind of relationship (title: best friend, lover, companion)
- communication becomes more personalized, synchronized, and easier
- TWO phases: interpersonal commitment- commit to each other in a private way vs. social bonding- commitment is made public (example: engagement, wedding)
- increase display of affiliative cues (Duchenne smiles)
- talk more affectionately, more lovingly, and more deeply
Deterioration
- see the weakening of bonds between parties and represents the downside of relationship progression
- many reasons for its occurrence
- reasons for coming together are no longer present or change drastically
- relationship no longer lessens loneliness or provides stimulation or self-knowledge
Repair
- intrapersonal repair- analyze what went wrong and consider ways of solving relational difficulties
- consider changing behavior or expectations of partner
- weighing of pros and cons
- interpersonal repair- talk about problems, corrections, what you're willing to do, and what you want the other person to do
- stage of negotiating new agreements and behaviors
- REPAIR strategy (recognize the problem, engage in productive conflict resolution, pose possible solutions, affirm each other, integrate solutions, and risk giving)
Dissolution
- cutting of the bonds tying you together
- interpersonal separation- no physical contact or communication (example: moving out, legal separation)
- social/public separation- changing definition of relationship (example: divorce, title to single status)
- final goodbye can be a stage of relief and relaxation or anxiety, frustration, guilt, & grief
- how to deal with dissolution (break the loneliness-depression cycle, take time out, bolster self-esteem, seek the support of others, and avoid repeating negative patterns)
Here is a video that demonstrates the stages of a relationship:
Interesting information I haven’t been through such information in a long time.
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